Chandigarh: In a groundbreaking announcement, Punjab’s political leaders have proudly unveiled their newest scheme—not for jobs, not for education, not for healthcare—but for a grand total of 500 new photo opportunities across the state.
Speaking at a press conference (of course, after posing for 37 pictures), one senior leader declared, “People keep asking us about employment, infrastructure, and corruption. But what they really need is more of our smiling faces in the newspapers and on social media. This is real development!”
Under the scheme, every new pothole filled will include a ribbon-cutting ceremony, complete with balloons, rose petals, and at least five photographers. Villagers requesting basic amenities will now be given free access to the leader’s photo album, because—according to officials—“a framed photo is almost as good as a clean water supply.”
Sources reveal that some leaders are now offering ‘Selfie with Netaji’ packages. For a small fee, you can take a selfie with your MLA while standing on a half-constructed road. Meanwhile, a new political startup, PhotoShoot Punjab Pvt. Ltd., has been contracted to manage the growing demand for staged handshakes, fake smiles, and dramatic pointing-at-things-that-don’t-matter.
Citizens, however, are growing restless. One farmer in Ludhiana complained, “We asked for crop subsidies, but they gave us a group photo holding sugarcane. My buffalo is still hungry, but at least my leader looked handsome in the newspaper.”
Analysts say this trend is unlikely to end soon. With elections around the corner, leaders are expected to release glossy calendars, campaign photo books, and even a Netflix documentary titled “Netaji: From Selfie to Seat.”
In conclusion, development may be missing, but one thing is certain—Punjab’s leaders will never miss their perfect angle.